The Life Of An Escort

Petra J .. an old escort girl showed me the way. She did a lot with me, that is, she took me with her. One man, two women. You cannot learn better. She explained to me how to work physically, mentally and financially as an escort in Ibiza.

Escort Ibiza – – – – That means?
Petra J .. An example. A customer comes and wants traffic without rubber for 20 euros. I get in and then convince him of blisters with chest touch for 30 euros. In the end he is happy, although he did not get what he wanted. This is psychology. But today, the fewest women know how to do it. You have to learn that. There is a need for human knowledge.

Escort Ibiza – – – – What was the craziest thing a customer asked you to do?
Petra J .. This was down here in Kurfürsten street. A customer stops. He immediately says he has a curious desire. There was a bratwurst on the passenger seat. I should introduce him anal. And he wanted to turn on the bratwurst sitting with me a round in the car. I just thought, could it be? You can take a dildo. But he was dragging a bratwurst.

tumblr_nw73c8BcuO1uwo5odo1_500Escort Ibiza – – – – But you did it?
Petra J .. Yes, of course. He paid me 80 marks. For once around the block drive.

Escort Ibiza – – – – The money kept but your friend and pimp?
Petra J .. Yes, I have always delivered everything. I also cleaned and cooked. He was a bodybuilder, and if the vanilla shake was not what he wanted, I got it overhead. He beat me up and raped me. Once he tied me up in the ice cold on the balcony and poured over with water. I do not know why I liked that. Meanwhile, he’s dead. He’s got his punishment.

Escort Ibiza – – – – Your new friend knows what you are working for?
Petra J .. Yes. He is nice to me, also wants me to get off. At the moment, however, he is under investigation. Somehow is always chaos with me.

Escort Ibiza – – – – A pimp you no longer have?
Petra J .. No. Women of my age do not have a pimp. We are no longer profitable. This is worth only 30, 32, with Dominas perhaps a bit longer ..

Escort Ibiza – – – – How many customers do you have a day?
Petra J .. Two to three a week. Nothing compared to earlier. There were always seven, eight serpents waiting for them.
Escort Ibiza – – – – What have you earned in the years?
Petra J .. I can not say exactly. It used to be a thousand on a good day. A friend has calculated it for itself and has come to several million sales.

Escort Ibiza – – – – Have you covered anything?
Petra J .. No. Everything away. I get a pension of 62 euros later. My jewelry, my Cartier watch, I had to sell everything

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Love Hotels in China

The Guardian has just run an article about China’s new “Love Hotel” industry. Its interesting to see how fast and far the Chinese culture is changing. In 1989 just 15% of Chinese had engaged in sex before marriage, according to state media. Today more than 70% have. Good for them!

The journalist seems to have a couple of slightly strange perceptions though. Apparently the Japanese have more than 30,000 Love Hotels to “to escape the prying eyes of a deeply conservative society” Really? Hentai anyone? They just have really small (normally shared) apartments and tend to live at home until they get married.

I remember that one motel chain that was popular with London escorts in the 1980s used to have nightclubs in all their hotels and the slogan “eat, meet, sleep” on very large signs outside them. Not quite the same thing, but they did rent rooms by the afternoon, so then again maybe it was. I am sure that more mature London escorts will remember them well!

Ibiza escorts car sex

Of course, for girls who escort Ibiza clients pretty much every hotel is a love hotel. And I know the same is true for most women who escort Marbella visitors too! But even case-hardened Ibiza escorts are still amazed by what they see “civilians” getting up to in high-end hotels. You would think nothing would shock a professional Ibiza escort, but they are surprised most days by something that a “normal” person gets up to in the name of love or lust.

Obviously leisure and lifestyle locations such as Ibiza, Marbella and the like are very different to major cities such as London. And Western cultures are distinctly different from Asian. But at the end of the day, people are people and sex is sex. Both people and sex come in every imaginable flavour. And people need somewhere that they can have sex without frightening the horses (as we English say – look it up).

London escorts, Marbella escorts, Ibiza escorts. Young girls, mature women, romantic or lustful. At the end of the day we all have our needs. And whether we meet someone in a Chinese love hotel, or invite an Ibiza escort back to the Hard Rock Hotel, when you get right down to it, its pretty much the same.

Getting back to the Guardian article, I did enjoy the apparently sweet attitude of the owners of businesses that are basically used for people to have recreational sex.

tumblr_nqrwvcDpqp1r0gu56o1_540“Sun also shied away from the label “love hotel” despite having named her chain after 37°2 le Matin, a 1985 erotic movie by French director Jean-Jacques Beineix. “Our hotels should be called lovers’ hotels not love hotels,” she said, adding: “We do not offer any sex toys or these kind of things in the rooms.”

China’s nascent love hotel movement still raises eyebrows in some quarters.

Wang said elderly residents of a community next to a Lots of Love hotel in north-east Beijing had taken exception to a recent advertising campaign that featured the slogan: “Extreme passion, extreme romance!”

“They thought it would mislead their children,” Wang recalled. The slogan was changed.

Despite that setback Wang said the future was bright for China’s fledgling love hotel industry. He boasted that in Tianjin motels had caught on to such an extent that parents were now booking rooms for their children.

Each night queues form at the Lots of Love reception, where affection-starved guests can choose from one of 55 themed bedrooms – including Shakespeare’s Room 204 – on an iMac computer.

Before taking a lift upstairs, visitors peruse a cabinet filled with bottles of 399 yuan ($60) pink lambrusco and packets of instant noodles.

“We provide a romantic place for lovers,” said Wang.”

Awww…

Kisses

Ally x

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Set Up An Escort Agency! It Is Really Simple!

People think that setting up an escort agency is the easiest thing in the world. All you have to do is get a bevy of gorgeous women to trust you, build a website and get it onto the front page of Google and then have clients call you.  Easy.

Riiight.

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Very simple move. When you can do it.

It is certainly a lot easier to start an escort agency business than to start, say, a rival to Mercedes Benz or SpaceX. But that’s not the same as being easy. Setting up an escort agency and being successful requires a combination of brains, balls, money and skills. Obviously the more money you initially have, the less brains and fewer skills you need, because you can hire those in. But surely it must be easy to sell men on the idea of spending time with sexy escorts?

Take each of those three broad stages in turn; getting beautiful escorts to trust you with their reputations and safety, getting a website to the top of the first page on Google, and having clients call and book dates with your new collection of escort girls.

If you say each of them quickly, it doesn’t sound like much. But think about it for a minute and the problems become a little clearer.

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Just walk up and ask if they are hookers. Easy!

Recruiting the right selection of sexy escorts is surely easy? All professional escorts are just in it for the money, so surely they will work for anyone? Well firstly, that’s not true because they are placing their reputations, finances and physical safety into the hands of the escort agency they work with. Secondly, how do you recruit them? You can´t call them because you don’t know them. They wont call you because they don’t know you. And you cant call the ads on the internet or the (in places such as Spain) newspapers because those are mainly placed by rival escort agencies. Hmmm…

Surely getting your new escort agency website to show on Google is easy? Well, leave aside building your site in the first place because that is increasingly easy. And if you build it, Google will find it. But for Google to rank it, the absolute minimum factors they look for are relevance and trust. That means having a minimum number of words (no, I don’t plan on telling you that here!) with a minimum percentage of them exactly the same as the keywords that potential clients search for. And again, I’m not going to tell you what the optimal keyword density is or how to find the most important keywords that clients use when looking for escorts in Marbella, London escorts, whatever. They are all different, by the way. Then, most importantly, you need to prove to Google that your site is trustworthy by getting lots of links (backlinks) to your new London escort agency site from lots of older and highly trusted sites. Just to give you an idea, if you want to market glamorous Marbella escorts you will need to have over 10,000 links into your site to even be in the game. Nice.

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Waiting for your adverts to work

You cannot use Google adwords for your sexy girls in Ibiza or wherever, as Google will not accept advertising for anything that could be sexual services, despite the fact that the internet is essentially a sex delivery system. So, that’s pretty straightforward then.

Now all you have to do is to get clients to trust your new escort agency and make bookings with you. Well what could go wrong with that? Well, if you have an escort agency anywhere other than a small town there is the language barrier. If you have escorts in Marbella, for example, you will get calls in Spanish, English, German, Russian, Swedish, Italian, French…

And you might find that potential clients have some concerns that you need to assuage. Are the escort women in the photos the escort girls that will actually arrive? Are the photos of your sexy escorts real?  Will the Marbella escorts be accompanied by large men who steal your belongings? Are the girls you represent trafficked? Are they underage? Are they professional escorts of their own free will? Are you drug dealers?

The answers, by the way, had better be yes, yes, no, no, no, yes, no. In that order.

And now all you have to do is get the escort girls to the booking, have them get paid, keep them safe, get you commission, pay your taxes and stay 100% within the law. So that’s OK then.

Good luck with all that and I hope to compete with you in the near future.

Kisses

Ally x

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Drug dealers advertising

This hysterical article in The Metro was sent to me a few weeks ago. I´ve been thinking about it and I’m still not sure whether to be impressed with the initiative or stunned by the stupidity.

A drug dealer called Jay has been card-dropping business cards around Fallowfield in Manchester to give potential customers his phone number. How do I know he´s a drug dealer? because he has been attaching little samples of weed to the business cards that he leaves.

You see the quandary – impressive initiative and classic marketing. There is nothing like a free sample to build a bit of traction with customers. But  he is doing something illegal and giving the police the means to catch him. Even if they don´t call the number to set up a buy he´d better keep his GPS off!

Don´t get me wrong, I absolutely use card drops to advertise the services of every Ibiza escort I represent. And I know that my friends who manage escorts in Marbella do the same. But what we are doing is totally legal.

So I’m still not sure what I think about Jay and his advertising campaign around the University of

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No free samples

Manchester. Part of me hope he prospers for his initiative and balls, part of me hopes he gets busted for his apparent stupidity. yet another part hopes that students don’t take drugs…riiiight.

In any case, since it´s legal I shall continue advertising my sexy Ibiza escorts and I´m sure the same will be true for all 2nd Circle´s girls in Marbella. And no, there are no free samples!

Kisses

Ally x

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What happens when a woman is drunk in public?

When men find a woman drunk and apparently in need of help, what happens? They proposition her, try to get her more drunk, and attempt to trick her back to their hotels rooms.One apparently even tries to get intimate with her in the street!

I don’t often find myself reading The Metro but this article was sent to me and while it staggering, disgusting and shattering to watch it actually happening, it really isn’t surprising.

The experiment was set up and filmed by the Centro Europeo Neurosalus, which is a rehab clinic. It was shot in central Madrid at 5.30 on a weekday. Now I´m sure that some people´s knowing reaction will be “ah…Spanish men” but right at the start of the video it is pointed out that the same experiment has already been conducted in other cities including Los Angeles.

Probably the most shocking thing about the video is that it wasn’t shot on a Saturday night. It is early evening (mid afternoon for the Spanish) on a work day. So what would / does go on every Friday and Saturday night?

This is part of the reason why we take the security of every Ibiza escort so seriously. And I know that our friends who represent escorts in Marbella feel the same. If a “civilian” can be treated like this in the middle of the afternoon in a public square, what might happen to an escort in Ibiza or a beautiful young lady in Marbella while everyone is partying?

So my security team and receptionists are fairly fanatical and puritanical about escorts being drunk or in any other way “worse for wear”. If clients want to drink or let their hair down in whatever way they choose, good for them. But I will not allow the ladies I represent to put themselves in harms way for the sake of having a couple of drinks.

So it sounds a little puritanical and prudish for an escort agency in party-central, but if a girl is drunk or off her game in any way, we will lose a booking rather than send her out there.

Looking at this video, you can see why.

Kisses

Ally x

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Getting Stabbed In Ibiza Pays Well

24 year old British tourist Grant Sommerville was stabbed by a taxi driver in Ibiza in 2013. It happened in a dispute over a taxi fare. He received 22 staples in his stomach to repair the injuries. And 39,000 euros in compensation from the taxi driver.

The whole story is covered very well here in the Metro. To anyone who knows the lovely island of Ibiza it sounds like an all too familiar story; a gang of drunk young Brits, a stressed, angry and possibly frightened local, and a dispute over not very much money.

Like many taxi drivers in Ibiza, Antonio Mari Planells, aged 31, did exactly the wrong things if de-escalating the problem was his intention. He should have realised that pretty much all Brits assume that everyone overseas is trying to rip them off and will wreak terrible vengeance on them like a Mexican drug cartel given half a chance.

But Mr Sommerville and his friends were probably right in their assumption about being ripped off in this case. Many of our lovely escort girls in Ibiza used to find themselves in the back of a licensed taxi who claimed not to know where the Hard Rock Hotel is (erm, really?) or how to get from Ibiza town to San Antonio in less than an hour.

But my point isn’t that lots of taxi drivers on Ibiza could do with a bit more of the “knowledge” or even Google maps on their phone!

My point is that 39,000 euros in compensation for 22 staples and a terrific battle scar will seem like a fair deal to lots of young British men. On an average Saturday night in any British town there are thousands of men willing to risk a stabbing over a pint of crappy lager.

So, our beautiful escorts will only be using our own drivers from now on. And leaving the taxis to the compensation seeking boys with their hospital beds booked.

Kisses

Ally

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Two Hours In The Life

So what does a couple of hours in my life look like when I’m managing bookings at high season?

Okay, so it’s 3 AM and I’m sat on my bed with the air conditioning going full blast. My desk lamp is on the night table beside me. Also on the night table the pot of Earl Grey tea in a little china teapot with a cup. Under the bed is my small white dog. Sat beside me on the bed is my marmalade cat.

Much more practical than satin

Much more practical than satin

I am not dressed in silky satin lingerie. Instead I’m wearing my daisy duke shorts and a peasant top. My hair is scrunched up in an untidy ponytail and held firmly in place with a pen. My wedge heels are discarded at the foot of the bed. Not the image of a Madam you expected is it?

My night really started about nine in the evening when a gentleman who I’ve spoken with for almost a week came on and asked if we could provide this service in Cairo. As we haven’t booked a girl with him all week and have negotiated price constantly, I told him that as it happens I cannot provide a service in Cairo.

I do try to help out regular customers all around the world as I have contact with escort girls who travel independently and let me know where they are on their travels, other suppliers and other agencies. Frankly I can and am very happy to help out and put beautiful girls and nice gentleman together.

That gentleman was followed by one of my ladies wanting another lady to join her and her personal client (booked directly with her on a regular basis). That doesn’t happen very often but it’s always very flattering when one of your professional escorts trust you enough to ask you to provide another girl to join her in the service.

How I should probably dress to answer the phone in the early hours

How I should probably dress to answer the phone in the early hours

So in the last thirty minutes I arranged for Jessica to turn up. Jessica has long blonde hair, is cute end petite and will do very well besides Julia who is tall and dark. So that is how my evening started a few hours ago and now it’s 3:30 AM and I’m dealing with potential  clients of all nationalities.

I have a couple who only speak Spanish who would like a bisexual lady to join them. A gentleman who speaks Russian (I think) and his message on WhatsApp says that he is looking for a lady that wants to buy a second hand car! Oh the joys of translation software!  It’s all very well if one of the parties is at least using their first language, but when all parties concerned are using the second or third language to try and negotiate a deal you can imagine how complicated it can get.

I have arranged for a lovely gentleman from Denmark to meet a sweet Ibiza escort girl from Brazil and I’m now talking to a gentleman from Qatar and making arrangements for him and his friend from Saudi Arabia. And I am also back chatting to local Spanish gentlemen and a financial services recruitment consultant on holiday from the UK.

It at this point in the evening that I decided that maybe I be better employed in International relations than running an escort business in Ibiza. But maybe it’s all the same thing really. (Fill in your own gag here)

So why do escorts bring together people of all nations and backgrounds?

So why do escorts bring together people of all nations and backgrounds?

If only we all got on so well in other areas of our lives, life would be so much nicer I think.

It seems the gentleman from Qatar would like to see the Russian girl I sent details of and his friend from Saudi Arabia would like to see a hot Spanish chica. So like some large international game of chess, all the pieces are now in play. I do hope it doesn’t turn into a game of snakes and ladders.

Now it’s just after four and I have got another hour or so to take it easy before the early morning rush starts about 5 AM right through to 8 AM. It might just get really busy and that’s when this will turn into something much more like an adrenaline-fuelled version of the 3D chess from Star Trek.

You may of course think this sounds like a wild ride. But this is just another day in the office. I’ve got at least another 61 days just like this before the season ends. I hope they’re all as exciting and interesting as this international game this evening…

So that was a couple of hours in my life and probably not what you expected. I’m going to go and put the kettle on again now. Talk to you all soon.

Kisses

Ally x

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