Two Hours In The Life

So what does a couple of hours in my life look like when I’m managing bookings at high season?

Okay, so it’s 3 AM and I’m sat on my bed with the air conditioning going full blast. My desk lamp is on the night table beside me. Also on the night table the pot of Earl Grey tea in a little china teapot with a cup. Under the bed is my small white dog. Sat beside me on the bed is my marmalade cat.

Much more practical than satin

Much more practical than satin

I am not dressed in silky satin lingerie. Instead I’m wearing my daisy duke shorts and a peasant top. My hair is scrunched up in an untidy ponytail and held firmly in place with a pen. My wedge heels are discarded at the foot of the bed. Not the image of a Madam you expected is it?

My night really started about nine in the evening when a gentleman who I’ve spoken with for almost a week came on and asked if we could provide this service in Cairo. As we haven’t booked a girl with him all week and have negotiated price constantly, I told him that as it happens I cannot provide a service in Cairo.

I do try to help out regular customers all around the world as I have contact with escort girls who travel independently and let me know where they are on their travels, other suppliers and other agencies. Frankly I can and am very happy to help out and put beautiful girls and nice gentleman together.

That gentleman was followed by one of my ladies wanting another lady to join her and her personal client (booked directly with her on a regular basis). That doesn’t happen very often but it’s always very flattering when one of your professional escorts trust you enough to ask you to provide another girl to join her in the service.

How I should probably dress to answer the phone in the early hours

How I should probably dress to answer the phone in the early hours

So in the last thirty minutes I arranged for Jessica to turn up. Jessica has long blonde hair, is cute end petite and will do very well besides Julia who is tall and dark. So that is how my evening started a few hours ago and now it’s 3:30 AM and I’m dealing with potential  clients of all nationalities.

I have a couple who only speak Spanish who would like a bisexual lady to join them. A gentleman who speaks Russian (I think) and his message on WhatsApp says that he is looking for a lady that wants to buy a second hand car! Oh the joys of translation software!  It’s all very well if one of the parties is at least using their first language, but when all parties concerned are using the second or third language to try and negotiate a deal you can imagine how complicated it can get.

I have arranged for a lovely gentleman from Denmark to meet a sweet Ibiza escort girl from Brazil and I’m now talking to a gentleman from Qatar and making arrangements for him and his friend from Saudi Arabia. And I am also back chatting to local Spanish gentlemen and a financial services recruitment consultant on holiday from the UK.

It at this point in the evening that I decided that maybe I be better employed in International relations than running an escort business in Ibiza. But maybe it’s all the same thing really. (Fill in your own gag here)

So why do escorts bring together people of all nations and backgrounds?

So why do escorts bring together people of all nations and backgrounds?

If only we all got on so well in other areas of our lives, life would be so much nicer I think.

It seems the gentleman from Qatar would like to see the Russian girl I sent details of and his friend from Saudi Arabia would like to see a hot Spanish chica. So like some large international game of chess, all the pieces are now in play. I do hope it doesn’t turn into a game of snakes and ladders.

Now it’s just after four and I have got another hour or so to take it easy before the early morning rush starts about 5 AM right through to 8 AM. It might just get really busy and that’s when this will turn into something much more like an adrenaline-fuelled version of the 3D chess from Star Trek.

You may of course think this sounds like a wild ride. But this is just another day in the office. I’ve got at least another 61 days just like this before the season ends. I hope they’re all as exciting and interesting as this international game this evening…

So that was a couple of hours in my life and probably not what you expected. I’m going to go and put the kettle on again now. Talk to you all soon.

Kisses

Ally x

big red lips kissing finger

Help! I’ve Run Out of Girls!

It was 5:30 AM and I was stood at my kitchen counter having a glass of wine glass of wine while eating scrambled eggs. My mobile phones were ringing off the hook, I’d been awake for 20 hours and I was not sure whether I was eating breakfast or dinner, so what the hell; wine with eggs.

It is the end of Ramadan, which is also the start of the big work season here in Ibiza. You would think this would be fantastic news; bookings all over the place.

girl in lingerie and coat at hotel door

I really hope this is the right room

However it was 5:30 AM and I had run out of escort girls. I had no escorts in Ibiza to send out on any calls. All of them were working either for me or somebody else, or alternatively they are too tired to get out of bed. Dirty lazy bones!

This business is like that. Feast or famine. Either you have too many beautiful girls or not enough. Today there were too many clients and not enough girls. So I had run out of Ibiza escorts but the calls kept coming and coming. (pun intended!)

I really really hate to have to say no to clients at any time; today or any time of the year. So I did my very best to change bookings around and make sure the right girl got the right guy and attempted to fulfil as many calls as possible.

But it is very frustrating having worked hard all year to generate the enquiries to then end not be able to fulfil them. I’m sure you can understand.

Of course having this number of calls is good news, Running out of girls means I had a lot of girls working. Which means that when I went to bed in the morning at 10 AM I was tired but happy as everybody had a good working day, morning, night, whatever you want to call it and we could all rest knowing that we can do it all again tomorrow.

beautiful girl in red lingerie and high heels on stripey vespa

This would be a great idea!

I have to say that it can be a very adrenaline fuelled business during the summer. When you get a booking, getting the right girl to the guy in the amount of time specified and making sure everybody is happy and safe is challenging. It probably takes only a maximum of an hour “flash to bang” (pun again intended!) but it’s very intense at the beginning of the call organising the lady to turn up.

Sometimes I need to get girls in Ibiza to gentlemen within 15 or 30 minutes maximum, no matter where the gentleman is. The girls need to arrive on time and ready to go so I probably have 10 to 15 minutes to sort out the right lady, get her dressed in the right way, negotiate the price on both sides, make sure there is safe transport and check on arrival.

It can be demanding and exhausting but it can also be a lot of fun because it’s nice to make everybody happy. Especially when you make a little bit of money along the way.

Kisses

Ally

big red lips kissing finger

I love a professional

“Hi can I help?”

It was mid afternoon on Thursday. I was alone in the office as Alex had decided to go shopping for beauty creams and presents. I was hoping to have a lovely peaceful coffee and catch up on some paperwork. So I have to admit I chased her out of the door with a sunny wave saying “don’t rush back, see you soon”. Mistake. Big mistake!

So “Hi can I help” I said. The contact is Claudio who I have heard is a lovely Italian gentleman.

The best way to use a computer I think

The best way to use a computer I think

“Vorrei prenotare una ragazza per me e mia moglie oggi alle 18:00.” Ah.

“I’m sorry, I don’t speak Italian. Do you speak any English?” I asked. I know it’s rude and we are all European now but I am a product of 1960s comprehensive education.  So languages are not my big thing, though I can get by in Spanish.

“A leeteel” he said.

“ Fantastic how can I help?”

“Weeelll “ he said “eermm  vorrei prenotare una ragazza per me e mia moglie oggi alle 18:00”

OK not so good. I mean it doesn’t take a genius to work out that he wants to see a girl at 18:00 but where and for how long?  Let’s do the easy bit.

“Who would you like to see I ask?” We have lots of gorgeous ladies so it saves time to start by asking.

He replies almost instantly with “Angela”.  Now this would be cool but she hasn’t checked in with her availability today so I am not sure if she is working. Damn. “I need to find out and then I can confirm all of the details” I say, “That make sense?” I add.

A very empathic and enthusiastic “Si!” is his reply.

“OK. I will call you back.

“Quando?” he asks

Erm, a little help?

Erm, a little help?

“5 mins” I say.

“ Noooo” he says “18:00”

Not good.  “Ustedes hablan español?”

“Yes a little” he replies. Thank heavens! At least this I should be able to work out.

“Necesito confirmar con ella” (I need to check with her)

“Voy a verla a las 18:00 ( I will see her at 18:00)” he says.

Fuck Fuck Fuck this is not going to plan….

“OK I will text you” I say in my best garbled Spanish.

“Si Si” he says.

For the next few minutes Google translate becomes my new best friend as I try to communicate the details of the booking with him via text. Come back Alex! Alex speaks Italian and has dealt with him before.

I call her with a cry for help “ Please come back now and talk to Claudio!” I cry “I think he thinks Angela is turning up at 18:00 and she is not available and I don’t know how long for or where or what or anything!”

At least I thinks that’s what I said as it was all a little excited. For some reason I hate letting polite and nice clients down in any way. Arseholes give me no stress at all. But if someone is being sweet then my customer service gene kicks into overdrive.

sexy_stockings_on_vespa

The Italians do sexy very well.

She says she can be back in 15 mins.  Thank heavens. I tell Claudio that she will be back to talk to him soon.

Now I have to track down Angela. After a few calls and texts in turns out that she is in hospital with food poisoning.  Damn! Even I can’t bring myself to give her a hard time for not telling me. Though secretly I am a little miffed that I’m not the person she calls straight after her emergency contact.

The question then becomes who shall I recommend? Thank God Alex will be back to explain to him that Angela wont be able to make it.

When Alex is back she soothes the international relations and get the all of the details of the booking. I start to make the arrangements.

One of the nice things about running the best escort agency in Ibiza is that we have our choice of great escorts who fit just about every requirement.

Helena she is working today and is very good with languages, though unfortunately not Italian.  I call her to check availability and the details.  The conversation goes something like this:

“It’s a couple” I say. “OK” she says.

“They want total GFE for both of them” I say. “OK” she says.

” Its two hours” I say. “OK” she says.

“You have to arrive at 6pm” I say. “OK” she says.

”They only speak Italian” I say “OK” she says.

“Oh and they are both in their 70’s” I say. “OK. Any special requirements?” she says

“No” I say. “OK” she says.

I just love working with professionals! They make life so much easier.

Kisses

Ally x

image_14 (3)